I used to look at other people’s selfies with disdain, thinking it was pretty self-involved. I don’t think I’ve ever posted a selfie. But the challenge for myself this week is to post one. And here’s why.
My children need to see my face.
They need to see that I’m comfortable enough with myself to share myself with the world. Heck, they need to see that I think I’m beautiful… even when sometimes I don’t believe this. They need to see that I have the courage to share myself regardless of imperfections.
They need a role model, AND they need memories of me. Just in case.
We recently went on a family holiday. My husband loves to take family photos. He’s old school. We a use a – wait for it – actual camera! He likes to set it up with a timer then jump back into the frame… hoping our 8 and 3 year olds will look in the right direction 10 seconds later. I cringed every time he suggested another photo. Part of this annoyance was that sometimes I just like to enjoy the moment, to try and be mindful and notice the things around me, rather than try and take the perfect picture. But right now, in this stage of my life, I’m too concerned with how I look (self-involved much?). I’m carrying about 5-7kgs more than I’d like. I’m not enjoying my hair (trying to grow out an undercut!), and for this holiday (at a holiday house on the beach), I didn’t bring any makeup! So every time the camera comes out here’s the tirade of thoughts;
- How’s that blemish on my chin that I can’t cover up cause I didn’t bring my concealer?
- Can I stand a little more sideways so my arm doesn’t look so fat?
- Arghhh… old school camera, how do we apply a filter that makes me look a bit less frumpy?!
- Is it a full body pic? If so, suck that tummy in!
- Are any parts of my body that I actually like showing?
- And so on…
I don’t want my children to grow up with their mum shying away from the camera. Sure we have an abundance of #selfie photos now, but for every woman taking a selfie I guarantee there is another one, her self-image so damaged she hides from the lens.
Let’s teach our children to love themselves, in a world where battered self-images are the norm.
My mother in law did such a great job of this. She passed away in December last year, and we have an incredible abundance of gorgeous photos of her. Many of them are selfies she’s taken with her children and grandchildren. Never shying away from the camera – this women exuded confidence and strength. She knew who she was (loved and made by God) and wasn’t afraid to show the world. It is very sad knowing that there are no photos of her and I to remind me of the special relationship we shared. I was not as courageous as she was.
I challenge you to join me and take a photo of yourself with someone you love this week.