If your phone is making you twitchy, try a device diet

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If you are following me on Instagram then you might have seen my recent post about feeling ‘twitchy’. In it, I described how I had walked two doors down from work to grab a coffee, and halfway there had spun around to go back and get my phone. 

I was going to be two doors away for less than 10 minutes and I couldn’t handle leaving my phone. It wasn’t necessarily that I wanted to be available if someone were to call or message me. Rather, what little ‘job’ could I do in that time when the barista was working his magic for me?

As I walked back to grab the phone, I had an eerie out of body experience. I was watching myself do this, and thinking how utterly stupid and slightly scary it was. But I couldn’t stop myself. This ‘twitch’ to get lost in the online world was strong.

And it’s bugged me ever since.

The ‘twitch’

Checking my Facebook feed, my Instagram feed, my website stats, and my emails have become akin to an annoying sand-fly bite that you just have to itch. Annoying and satisfying all at once. These actions are what Anthony Ongario describes as ‘twitches’.

He describes the ‘twitch’ as an “unintentional, unproductive response to discomfort” (watch his short Ted-x talk about it).

Then a few days later I read this from the New York Times.

The article is summed up in one sentence from an ex-google executive.

“I’m convinced the devil lives in our phones and is wreaking havoc on our children”

It’s not the first article I’ve read that has a scaremongering feeling to it. And I’m sure it won’t be the last. I felt a little annoyed at the fear-inducing tone, but I think the level of annoyance correlates to how much I needed to hear the message. It highlights how much time I’ve wasted (lost) in the online world.

Can I be honest with you?

I’m scared. My eldest is only nine and while she doesn’t have her own phone or electronic device at all, she often uses ours. For hours at a time (we’ve tried several different things to reduce and limit her time on it. But nothing sticks very well).

The amount of time she spends on electronics doesn’t scare me, it’s the ‘twitchiness’ I see in her too. It’s the resistance to look for other things to do. It’s the times when she chooses screens over playing outside. Over getting lost in the ‘real’ world. 

I’m scared for her, and every other child’s struggle to find their place in the world, alongside what has been described by silicon valleys finest as ‘the devil’.

And nope, I don’t have the answers. Sorry to disappoint but this will not be a blog post with ‘5 steps to reduce your family’s screen time’, or ‘10 ways to x,y and z’. I just don’t have it figured out.

Our device ‘diet’

But what I do know is how good we feel in those precious hours we spend away from our screens.

This week our family has returned to our device break between 6ish and 8ish at night. This is where there is no television, and no iPad or laptops or phones. We started this habit a few months ago when my daughter wasn’t sleeping well. I knew the screen time before bed was part of the problem.

Over the winter this was lovely and we spent time doing dishes, taking long baths, and reading in front of the fire. Homework got done and hair even occasionally got braided the night before! And it’s not rocket science. All we were doing was living in the ‘real’ world. 

This is good for our family. Good for our souls.

But I need more than this. Working online takes its toll. I started this website almost 18 months ago now and it’s been fairly non-stop since then.

And while I adore what I do (writing and connecting online), like any job, time away is needed to help refresh us.

So I’m taking a break

For about a week, maybe more, maybe less (I’ll try and let my intuition lead me, rather than set a time limit), I’ll stay off social media (which is more like ‘work-media’ for me these days anyway). I don’t have Facebook on my phone, but Instagram and Pinterest (I’ve been spending way too much time here lately) are going too.

I’m going to write to my hearts content (I have lots in my heart that needs to go on paper), read a book while I’m waiting for my coffee, and get back to yoga. I’m going to immerse myself, heck I’m going to get lost – in the real world.

And I’m going to trust that my ‘vacation’ will have a positive influence on my daughters. I want them to see that we don’t have to be online all the time.

At the end of the time, I’ll come back online. Probably still scared. And I probably won’t be any closer to answers. But I think my head and heart will be a little less entangled with the noisy web. I trust it will be.

Thank you for letting me rant.

I’d love to know if you have been feeling ‘twitchy’ too? Drop me an email (simpleslowlovely@gmail.com) or comment below. Maybe you’ll even consider a ‘device diet’ like me.

Let’s explore the real world together!

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Image credits Joshua Hoehne and Khosit Sakul-Kaew

1 Comment

  1. Sandra November 7, 2018 at 3:58 am

    I think we all need some “device diet” … I think I should also try to avoid electronic devices from a period of time, specially before going to bed. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this. Good luck 🙂