Hands up who has been on a ride in a theme park before and had that awful feeling as they buckle you up. “Um, actually, I’m not sure about this”. And then, just like that, it’s too late. But inside you’re screaming ‘Stop! I want to get off!”
Well I get the same feeling with life, and want to yell “Stop the world, I want to get off!”.
Usually, when I get around to saying this it’s too late though. I get off. Stumble, fall, and am unable to pick myself up for a very long time. Overwhelm envelopes me and I’m crushed by the weight of my busy, overscheduled life.
The consequences of overwhelm and busyness for me usually progress to insomnia, anxiety, and panic attacks. And given time to marinate, anxiety and stress usually turns into depression.
I struggled for too many years in this cycle
And then, after the birth of my second daughter, the penny dropped. I realized I didn’t have to live this way anymore. I do not have to do all the things for all the people, all the time. I found my voice again and relearned the word NO. And now, I am redesigning my life, one tiny unbusy moment at a time.
If like me, you are constantly battling overwhelm and juggling too many things at once, I’d like to invite you to imagine for a moment a different way.
Imagine a different way
Imagine that busy is a state that’s foreign to you. You take on board what you are able to handle, and you leave a buffer for the unexpected. You’ve learned how to use the word no and you prioritize self-care.
You consistently find time to indulge in creative pursuits. You have time to spend cultivating quality connections with your friends and family, instead of a text or email once in a while. And when people ask how you’re doing your go-to response is ‘great thanks!’, instead of ‘busy’.
This vision, grasp it with both hands and don’t let go.
I’d love to show you how it might be possible to make that vision reality.
Five ways you can go slower today
Focus on your breathing
Our breath is so powerful. It literally gives us life. It’s no wonder that tuning into quality breathing can have amazing benefits. My introduction to mindful breathing was through hypo-birthing to aid the birth of my second child. This way of breathing had a profound effect on the way I approached the labor and ultimately the beautiful birth that followed.
Deep belly breathing has never come naturally to me though, and I still have to remind myself daily to go there. But stopping for a few minutes a day and concentrating on our breathing is my number 1 go to for slowing down. It grounds me and literally helps lower my cortisol levels.
Notice
Take a few minutes and notice 3 new things. Mindfulness techniques provide perfect opportunities to slow down. I love to do this one outside. Simply open the door and pop outside for a few minutes. I listen, smell and see. What is new in my backyard today. Nature is the perfect antidote for our busy lives. When I’m in a forest, with trees 10 times as high as me, I feel immense perspective. And everything else, all the lists, jobs, and stress, slips away.
The Power of No
Learn how to say no. So much of my busy has come from too many yes’s. Yes, I can work that extra day! Sure I can have your kids for a few hours. Yep, I can chair that committee. There are so many reasons why we overuse the word Yes. No feels a lot harder to say most of the time. But awhile back I instigated the 5-second rule. If I get asked to do something, I pause, count to 5, and then reply with either an easy No (you’ll get faster at figuring out what is an easy No) or that I’ll consider their request and get back to them. I don’t always stick to this but life is much less busy when I do.
Let go of perfection
Leave your washing on the line! I posted a picture on Instagram recently of my washing still on the line, and how this was part of my self-care for that day. It definitely resonated with people. But at its core, this is actually about me practicing imperfection. I’ve spent a good portion of my life being a perfectionist and all it does is keep me busy. Why? Perfection is unattainable so we never stop. The goalpost constantly moves and the roller coaster keeps going around. So I treat myself to a bit of imperfection all the time now. Muffins a bit overcooked? Too bad, they’ll be fine with a spoon of icecream.
Figure out your why
And this leads quite nicely to the last and possibly most important way you can slow your life down. Figure out your why. When you take some time to consider your values and goals in life you can then use that as a compass to help you decide how to use your time.
Your why (or purpose) is your compass. Without it, you are likely to keep drifting through the land of busy and overwhelm.
Can the see the vision of your slower life today?
Envisioning a different way is often the easy part, making the changes to get you closer to that vision is the tricky bit.
If you want to figure out how to get to that vision, I’d love to help you. Contact me today to find out how we can work together.
